4 min read

How to Maintain Relationships with Family and Friends After Conversion

How to Maintain Relationships with Family and Friends After Conversion

After your conversion to Islam, maintaining relationships with family and friends can be one of the most emotionally complex parts of the journey. Having to introduce new ideas to your family and friends, such as praying five times a day and eating halal meat, may be foreign to them, and unfortunately they may struggle to accept it. Learning to approach this tension with compassion, patience, and wisdom can help you navigate your way peacefully during this time. 

How to Conduct Yourself in Social Environments with Non-Muslims

Before entering social settings with non-Muslim family or friends, it’s helpful to reflect on their values, communication styles, and general openness to difference. Understanding these dynamics can give you a clearer sense of what to expect and help you approach interactions with greater patience and confidence.

For those with more conservative families and friends, it may be harder to approach them about the new changes. Therefore, subtle hints and actions may allow them to familiarize and get used to the new changes. For example, when swapping out regular meat, you can bring or prepare halal meat dishes for shared meals without making a big deal of it. You can say something like, “I found this halal butcher nearby and the meat is actually really good!” Alternatively, some reverts opt for eating vegetarian, where swapping for halal meat is difficult or not possible.  

Similarly, if you are spending time together and it is time to pray, you can excuse yourself simply by saying, “I’ll just take a few minutes to pray. Be right back!” In addition, if you are starting to dress more modestly, express your confidence without overexplaining. Your calm demeanor can be more convincing than any debate. These approaches do not guarantee acceptance from their behalf, but your persistence in your changes will convey to them your dedication to Islam, driving them to accepting your new lifestyle with time. 

On the other hand, some family and friends may be more open to new ideas. If that is the case, then sitting down with them and explaining your decisions and the changes that come along will provide them with a better understanding of your new lifestyle. 

Without doubt, you will be met with confrontations about the new changes. However, responding calmly and honestly, such as “this new change has brought me peace,” can ease tension and bring about acceptance. Keeping an open mind and having patience with them will create a space where they can ask you questions that broaden their understanding of Islam. Being Muslim strengthens your empathy for those around you. Moreover, your patience, good etiquette, and openness with them will convey a good message about Islam and can be a form of inviting people to the religion.

How to Continue Spending Time With Family and Friends

Without a doubt, your conversion will bring about new changes into your day-to-day life, as well as a change in the ways you choose to spend time with your family and friends. If there is a lack of acceptance and support from their behalf, it can be challenging to maintain your quality time with them, as your new lifestyle may not fit their standards. You may not want to compromise your new values for their sake. Therefore, finding alternative ways to connect that honour everyone's comfort can be helpful. For example, suggesting hangout spots that don't compromise your or their values is encouraged. You can meet at a dinner spot that offers halal food or go to girls/guys only activity spots. You could also invite them to go with you to the mosque or an Islamic lecture, allowing you to share the experience and knowledge of a Muslim. Involving them allows connection and understanding to take place. Your new lifestyle doesn't mean you compromise your relationships and fun.   

What Should I Do If Something Goes Wrong?

Unfortunately, in some cases, family members may not be accepting or supportive. In extreme cases, this can include being forced out of your home or facing intense conflict. If you find yourself in a situation where your safety or well-being is at risk, it is advised that you contact any trusted friends, supportive family members, or your local mosque for a temporary place to stay until the tension eases down. Maintaining good thoughts and patience during this time may make it easier for your family to settle down. Incidents of such are heavy on the heart. Thus, making sure you are taking care of your physical and mental health is crucial. Confiding in Allah through prayer and dua, and reaching out for support from organizations, friends, family, and local mosques may make it easier to cope during this stressful time.

You may also find yourself in a situation where you feel pressured to compromise your values in order to keep the peace or maintain closeness with family and friends. This can lead to feelings of guilt, disappointment, or confusion. However, remember that turning back to Allah in repentance and thinking of ways to avoid compromising your values next time is progress. Every moment of reflection, every effort to plan better for next time—whether that’s setting boundaries or suggesting alternative activities—is a meaningful step forward. Growth comes from consistently striving to align your actions with your intentions.

Maintaining relationships with family and friends after embracing Islam can be both beautiful and challenging. As you navigate this new chapter, remember that your efforts to uphold your faith while nurturing your connections are deeply valued. Allah rewards the believer for striving toward the straight path, and no struggle goes unnoticed nor unrewarded by Allah.

Subscribe to our newsletter.

Get thoughtful insights and updates from the Lantern.